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Why I Refuse To Let My Daughter Watch The Little Mermaid. I grew up on Disney. And when I think of Disney, yes, I envision Princes and Princesses.

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But to me, at their cores, these aren’t love stories, good or bad. Just like to me, the Hunger Games is far from a love story. Love is just a huge part of human experience, something we’re all preoccupied with, something we all have been taught to search for and cling to and look at through rose- colored lenses. So we filter many of our fairytales through love stories. All of the Princesses end up with Princes — even Mulan. The last scene is of the general coming over for dinner.

But the Disney Princesses have things to teach little girls that have nothing to do with their Princes. They all dream of better worlds, and sometimes do foolish things in search of them. They are hardly looking for love when they find it. I think Ariel’s most defining quality is her curiosity, as Laura said above. She made excellent points regarding Ariel’s motivations.

Disney is still in the business of Princes and Princesses. I think it is very naive to say that Anna is a stronger heroine than Ariel. Anna is exactly the same as Ariel, but a modernized version because she’s clumsy and infused with Kristen Bell’s irreverent mannerisms.

Anna’s foundation is that she’s completely sheltered, and then on the day she gets to leave the castle, she falls in love with the first guy whose boat she falls into! Ariel goes up to the surface and falls in love with the first handsome guy she sees (who’s on a passing ship…these parallels really are crazy). The only difference is that Anna’s prince is EVIL and trying to steal her sister’s crown, while Eric is good and sacrificed for Ariel in kind. There was a Disney animated series where Ariel basically just solved problems in her kingdom with Sebastian and Flounder.

You can envision a world where Ariel’s sister is in trouble, and she helps her too. Girls are complex, multifaceted, and capable of greatness in all areas of their lives, at home and abroad, and their education should encourage that, not stifle it. Falling in love is an intense, complex, confusing experience that can and does make fools out of the brightest among us. Maybe you could say Anna would have been stronger had she not ended up with Kristoff (your modern streetrat) (after THREE days of knowing him! I never really saw the two of them together, to be honest.) But then what are we saying?

That girls who up up alone are stronger than those in relationships? Falling in love is also beautiful, and something that your daughter, with all of her complexities and independent ambition, will highly anticipate. She should be exposed to a million versions of how it could play out. The first time I got into a relationship I realized that for all the time I spent dreaming of being in one, I’d had almost no discussions about how to navigate one, or how to go about merging my life and person with someone else. And I discovered stores of information in those around me, as well as in pop culture. And there were pieces of advice I heeded, and those I disagreed with, and there are definitely love stories I go back to and idealize, and one’s I criticize and analyze what I would have done differently, and there are horror stories. And they all enrich my experiences, and I’m always sorry I wasn’t exposed to them sooner.

For instance, I just started to watch The Astronaut Wives, which takes place in the 1. The women in the show are notably subservient to their husbands, which I expected. But I was surprised that they were shown sitting at the kitchen table together and openly discussing their wifely roles, calling them “choices” saying “but this is what we chose when we chose to wed”, encouraging each other to assert independence, and, at times, making conscious decisions to self- sacrifice, not out of fear, but out of love.

I think living today, with the majority having a more progressive idea of gender equality, we assume women back then just didn’t know how to want more for themselves. At least, I’ve assumed that in the past. But the show portrays the strength inherent in them, the different ways they took on what society threw at them, their learning curves, and I find it fascinating and absolutely relevant because I’m a twenty- something millennial who has been taught to want a career and an independent life, as much as a rich family life. I’m in a much different position than those women were — both of these dreams are in my reach, and I get stressed just thinking about how I’ll juggle them. Watching how those who came before me did it, and how those around me are doing it, just gives me more information to filter through.

Nothing can be learned by not experiencing something. Experiencing something peripherally can keep you from repeating other people’s mistakes. Your reason for demonizing The Little Mermaid is the same argument for denying sex ed in schools, and not teaching about the holocaust to prevent scapegoating and genocide.

Your concerns about how to retain your sense of self in love, and self- sacrifice, are absolutely relevant, but we all inevitably have to negotiate them, especially as women. So in the meantime, you’re just denying your daughter the pleasure of beautiful music which she will eventually find anyway. 8 Bullets Watch Free Online on this page. My best friend and I duet- ed Part of Your World at a party last week. Disney rules!). She’s also eventually going to be exposed to hundreds of other things in pop culture that touch on this point way less gently, but every exposure will be an opportunity to learn. Because I’ve heard stories of battered women, I would be able to recognize an emotionally abusive relationship. As with everything, don’t demonize the medium. All that matters is what your daughter takes away from what she sees, and you can have influence there.

But if she doesn’t see it, there is no takeaway. As much as you want to, you can’t sterilize your daughter’s experience for long. Look at the trajectory here, backtracking. Ariel ends up on the surface without a voice. Before that, she gives her voice to a monster, a stranger.

Before that, her father chalks her rebellious spirit and dreams up to her being a teenager and all he says is, don’t go up to the surface. Which only makes her want to go up to the surface. Watch the movie with your daughter. Educate her. Teach her to be read, and listen, and think critically. Try to tell her what you want her to takeaway, but yeah, she’s probably too young to understand it. At this age, if your daughter is smart and strong and has some kind of attention span, her takeaway from the movie is going to have little to do with Eric.

It’ll be more like: Princes are still pretty, dream of better worlds, but don’t trust octopi 😉.